The Innate Musings of an Insane Mind :)

Sagittarians aren't memory Persons.And I seem to be a weirdo. I remember it exactly the way it was. Apart from the buzz around me here, the calls hovering, message boxes wailing with wishes, and the greasy cake strewn sticky hair and beautifully cake facialled face, I still feel the same, the way I felt a exactly a year before. Made me read all these all over again! A year before, seems to be lived back yesterday! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Its seems like a devastated seashore now; devastated with those deviant subtle thoughts that sounds utterly unexplainable and purely insensible, everytime I take an effort to sketch them completely. Life gives us certain moments, to hold on to at times, to cherish deep in our heart and to feel the warmth; those smiles and tears made you feel, everytime those moments flash around the corners of our minds! There are always certain ques

P.S: The lyrics Sayss it all ;)                                                     Abhi nahi aana sajana Mohe thoda marne de Intezar karne de Abhi nahin aana sajana Bhejiyo sandesha Aap nahin aana Thode door rahke Mohe tarsana Abhi to mein chahun, sari sari raat jagana Abhi nahi anna sajana Ruk ruk aana Dheere dheere chalna Bhoolna dagaria, raste badalna Nahi abhi mohe,garwa nahi hey lagna Abhi na jagaoh Bane raho sapna Abhi san-mukh na lawo mukh apna Abhi to mein chahun, aass lagaye rakhna. :) :)                           

P.S : The HOUSE effect !

                 Always did I crave to meet a Sagittarius Woman/Girl all these years just for the fact of comparing how detatched I am with the normal sagittarian Traits.Well to admit I have a strong belief in the Zodiacs and I find it easier to categorise the traits of People I meet, with their traits and I have been always right with my intutions. Dont dare to call me superstitious, but this has been something that I have learned from life experiences, though its not that galore to write a book on. So I was with this secret whim of meeting a Sagittarius Woman, And now life is walking my way. I got this bliss to wake up next to this perfect Sagittarian Girl. Wait a minute, for the one's having that parallel thought, Well I ain't a lesbian. :P                 This Girl is my sweet Roomie, my enthusiastic companion in all my culinary adventures, which are to last probably for the next long two years.  Well this Girl of whom I felt pompous at first sight has this much i

PS  : Awww!! Ileanaaa... <3

; P.S: The enticing music and the beautiful Shefali shetty! Oh My Gaud ! :D Indian Weddings Rock!! The sangeet, the colours, the people and the cliche dramas... makes it one millionth of an event for sure ! Well, Could you hear someone screaming aloud  "Wanna get married Wanna get married..!!"' Clearing the air,- That isn't definitely Me ! ;) :P

                             The lady had a withheld witchy expression on her face that reminded me of the Psychics. The long hair, Shiny nose ring and the antique jewels made her totally look like someone on a visit from the 10th century. The most attractive feature was her long nose which reminded me of Rema chitta ; adored with a lustrously shiny nose ring studded with a series of stones, a mix of ruby and some unknown whitestones. The browny stone studded necklace had a white human skull pendant at the centre that made her scary long figure much scarier. The long stick in her hand and the shaggy cloth bag on her shoulders imparted a nomadic look to her. She carelessly uttered strange words when she came near me. I couldn’t make out what she meant. It seemed to be of some other language. Was it my curiously wider eyes or my observations that caught her attention? I really don’t have a clue what it was.                               She bent towards me and smiled; her alternate

"Duh!!! am just begining to hate those moments in life when i can feel things "ChAnGe" and there is nothing much i can do about it... guess its better to leave the things Broken, rather than being HuRt each time in the process of fixing it back...... :/ "                   Read this on a friends wall and it Just made me think galore. The repentance, forgiveness and everything that I holded back seems to have frozen. Its good to have your emotions locked up I guess. Coz it just doestnt fit in as of now !

           I stare and stare at these pages and it makes no sense of loitering emotions in me. As the blank new post page welcomes me I am drained of all those I wanted to write this morning. Yes after all whats it that need for these thoughts to be expressed, who is to be impressed and convinced? Well as the days pass by I do realize me becoming more colder in every aspects. For instance, I have been concerned lately of how many people reads my blog rather than before when I yearned to know who all reads my blog. I have been removing and blocking all those people who had that key to reach me by every means. Attachments have become my nightmares these days. I do realise its this that I was afraid of that day. This state. You must be remembering the day when I told I'm afraid. Well Everything does make sense now.                    Well these fucked up whims arise from the small series of events that happened today morning. I was totally packed in time running through my m

Euphoria ! That's how I would love to express the feeling I have Right now.     An amazing realisation of what enthralls me and what not. A direction to move on to, a routine to stick on to, a life to live for, so is revenge to peace of mind.Yes, 'Revenge is never a straight line.Its a forest, And like in a forest its easy to lose your way, to get lost, to forget from where you came in. But once this roaring rampage of vengeance sets in, nothing but the bloody revenge can give you that contentment, to ease off the pains of all those days!     Some things once you do, in Life, for sure cant be undone. The unfinished Business..leaves the trail for the next meet. And Yes, when Fortune smiles on something as violent and ugly as revenge, its proof like no other that not only does God exist, but you are doing his will ! 

Khoyi khoyi si hoon main Kyun yeh dil ka haal hai Dhundli saari khwaab hai Ulja har khayaal hai Saari kaliyan murja gayi Rang unke yaadon mein reh gaye Saare gharaande reet ke Lehrein aayi, lehron mein beh gayi Raah mein kal kitni chirag the Saamne kal phoolon ki bhaag thi Kis se kahun kaun hai jo sune Kaante hi kyun maine hai chune Sapne mere kyun hai kho gaye Jaage hai kyun dil mein gumm mere Saare kaliyan murja gayi Rang unke yaadon mein beh gaye Saare gharaande reet ke Lehrein aayi, lehron mein beh gayi Na na na .. Kya kahun kyun yeh dil udaas hai Ab koi door hai na paas hai Choo le jo dil woh baatein ab kahan Woh din kahan raatein ab kahan Jo bhi dhakhal hai ab khawab sa Ab dil mera hai betaab sa Saari kaliyan murja gayi Rang unke yaadon mein beh gaye Saare gharaande reet ke Lehrein aayi, lehron mein beh gayi, beh gaye... P S : Though the movie was a whole crap , love the songs :) Amit Trivedi Rocks :D

           The words were banging in my ears. I tried hard to sleep, in-spite of the memories playing a parade in my mind. I pulled on the bed sheet and closed my eyes firmly. After long years I prayed hard for a deep sleep apart from the usual nightmares and disturbing thoughts. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------             The morning welcomed me with dizziness.  I tried to get up from the bed and failed blatantly.I felt the mind and body getting weaker and weaker. I saw her standing infront of me, enquiring If I was okay. The wine red colour of her salwar kinda pierced my eyes. With the maximum of efforts,I tried to open my eyes. Apart from my efforts, the lights played a bokeh effect and she seemed to vanish away from sight, as if surrounded by a mist. And in a minute I felt the inability to relate to the world.  Sounds were still heard, But I found it hard to respond. Gradually I slip

Yeah here we go for the hundredth time Hand grenade pins in every line Throw 'em up and let something shine Going out of my fucking mind Filthy mouth, no excuse Find a new place to hang this noose String me up from atop these roofs Knot it tight so i won't get loose Truth is you can stop and stare Run myself out and no one cares Dug the trench out laid down there With a shovel up out of reach somewhere Yeah, someone pour it in Make it a dirt dance floor again Say your prayers and stomp it out When they bring that chorus in [Chorus] I bleed it out digging deeper Just to throw it away I bleed it out digging deeper Just to throw it away I bleed it out digging deeper Just to throw it away Just to throw it away Just to throw it away I bleed it out [End Chorus] Go stop the show Choppy words and a sloppy flow Shotgun opera lock and load Cock it back and then watch it go Mama help me I'

Life always gives you second chances, to patch up, to mend the rifts , to re-unite, to refrain and to live a life of happiness. It never does denies you all those good fortunes it promised. Its our attitudes that deny those. We are the ones that try hard and master the tricks to fool ourselves in hope of making aka faking happiness. but everything has to have an end, a perfect end. Every of the events, each and everyone of us deserves justice. Life impartially offers it too; to every one of  us ! Justice delayed may be justice denied. But Life portrays it more beautifully. It sketches everything so perfect that we may even forget the darkest of the hours in a nick of time. Thats how Life expatiates justice. It has the unique ability to flood us with happiness ,love and hope any time . Even at the hardest of the hours Life soothes us with the ability to choose one thought over the other, to get along. And every tunnel does have a wide opening, an opening to that magnificient world

Look into my eyes - you will see What you mean to me Search your heart, search your soul And when you find me there you'll search no more Don't tell me it's not worth tryin' for You can't tell me it's not worth dyin' for You know it's true Everything I do - I do it for you Look into your heart - you will find There's nothin' there to hide Take me as I am, take my life I would give it all, I would sacrifice Don't tell me it's not worth fightin' for I can't help it, there's nothin' I want more You know it's true Everything I do - I do it for you There's no love like your love And no other could give more love There's nowhere unless you're there All the time, all the way, yeah Look into your heart, baby... Your can't tell me it's not worth tryin' for I can't help it there's nothin' I want more Yeah, I would fight for y

You were standing in the wake of devastation And you were waiting on the edge of the unknown And with the cataclysm raining down Insides crying "Save me now" You were there, impossibly alone Do you feel cold and lost in desperation? You build up hope, but failure’s all you’ve known Remember all the sadness and frustration And let it go. Let it go And in a burst of light that blinded every angel As if the sky had blown the heavens into stars You felt the gravity of tempered grace Falling into empty space No one there to catch you in their arms Do you feel cold and lost in desperation? You build up hope, but failure’s all you’ve known Remember all the sadness and frustration And let it go. Let it go Do you feel cold and lost in desperation? You build up hope, but failure’s all you’ve known Remember all the sadness and frustration And let it go. Let it go Let it go Let it go Let it go Let it go Do you fe

                               "So finally we are gonna meet !" The voice on the other side was excited. So was I. Still I just expressed it with a feeble hmm..Ignoring that she continued, "When was the last time we met? Before You left the city at the beginning of the year..Right? Oh so its been nearly a year !'"She sounded like a freak. I sighed. "So we'll meet up at the usual place? And you wanna see a movie? Like the last time? , I asked rather lightly, mocking a smile. A second later, I profusely wondered whether she found out that deliberate act of mine. I felt ashamed of myself. Not that I ain’t delighted with the idea of meeting my ever best friend, to be specific the childhood friend of mine who still owns the throne of my best friend, nearly after a year. I was happier, with just the thought of being with her. It was always fun being with her. There was something in her that in no one else I found, a special bond, a much safer feel, as I c

        When mind stretches beyond the catapulted levels of vehement struggles for a mere existence  no wonder We dont find room for those Little grievances and minor bruises that are surreally encrypted on our heart, mind and soul. And wonder why does it take much bitter, to be frank  exasperating, sultry experiences that tare apart the purity, simplicity and innocence of people, to mould them into people of much greater magnitudes ? The vehement searches, the unrealized dreams, the broken promises, and the cliched Life situations make us  exhausted, yet we yearn hard to live ahead, in a hope to find that promising Ray of a much better Life! Still while struggling, surrounded by a bunch of people with flesh, blood and ravishingly revolutionizing thoughts, it just get you the feeling of 'lost in the Crowd'.  'Madness as you know is like gravity all it takes is a lil push'! It just shadows our thoughts, mess up our actions and land us in a No-Mans land. All it takes

Time flies magnificiently. People move in and out of our Lives. Ignoring the pull-backs,we learn to swim ahead.We Learn the tricks to heal our wounds and scars. Still at times we turn back, nurse our wounds and lament. Soak ourselves in madness. Then Hurriedly Wipe off the tears. Laugh around the next moment. Pretend around. Fake smiles. Some gets the clue. Some doesn't. We learn the To act flawlessly. Innocense fade away. Character gains worth. Little things that once mattered tend to invoke just a faded smile now. Relationships die in a word war and take years to bloom. People change. Relationships seem to, but the true one's doesn't. Inspite of everything that happens around,Life still goes on. Like a river. From the source.To the destination.The journey in between ; making it all worthwhile to Live !

PS : Kareena Kapoor! Why dont you totally quit acting? :P

             And the world seemed to be in darkness, inspite the brightly lit sodium vapour side lamps that literally bathed the streets in the yellow tint, and the flashing lights from the vehicles typically,racing through the roads . Walking wasn't making me exhausted. It was the un-ending search for the destination, a lost feel, that oozed the blood out of me. Like in a maze, I walked the same yellow light strewn streets, passed those dusty windows again and again, kinda lost in the clamour of the crowd, wondering whether I'm literally in a circle with no entrance and exit ways to escape out. The  people around were murmuring, their voices were heard, but soon, like the background scores they faded too..and there remained an insipid vagueness that slaughtered my mind. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------                  'Tututu tutu.. Tututu Tutu..Tututu Tutu..Tututu tutu...Tututu